Saturday, October 20, 2018


We now know that Elizabeth Warren "Rain on the Brain" is only 1/1024 Native American. But, she will not let go of this demitasse spoonful of pure Cherokee blood. Native Americans on the reservation are mad as hops over this. They do not consider that minuscule bit of brown blood as valid to issue her a visa and fishing rights in Oklahoma.

What we have here is a White woman wanting to grab some votes, and she made herself an Indian so that all her Democrat pals would be forced to believe her DNA report or be accused of racism.

There is a solution to all of this discord and upsetment (olde Massachusetts worde).

Congress needs to pass a bill into law that every American has to have a DNA test to determine their racial origin. This will then make way for a system of sorting out who can play the race card. The percentage of each race will then be added to everyone's driver's license, and anyone wailing for mercy based on their race will have to show their driver's license to validate they claim to victimhood.

THE MULATTO EXCLUSION: This law must also include limitations. If someone is only 30% African America, while being German and Chinese also, they will not be permitted to claim they are African American in any racial dispute. Only a percentage of DNA over 50% will qualify a person to claim to belong to any racial group.

This will also disqualify General Colin Powell and Senator Booker from claiming they are African American if they are not over 50% pure blooded.

Also, anyone wishing to use his race to get a job under affirmative action rules will have to be over 50% the race being affirmed. Also, anyone who has over 20% of a particular race cannot be found guilty of racial hate crimes against that particular race. Thus, when a half German, half African American, degrades another African American, the offender cannot be prosecuted for racial hate because he is immune by virtue of his African DNA.

Furthermore; we must stop this practice of using Peruvian Indians as the test standard for Native American DNA. The Peruvians are all mixed up with Simon Bolivar DNA from the days of the Spanish Conquistadores long ago. In the case of Elizabeth Warren, it may actually be that she is more related to Christopher Columbus than to Geronimo.

Lastly, all Americans must be addressed with all their DNA heritage included. I demand to henceforth be addressed as Steve Van Nattan, AKA German, Dutch, Irish, and Cherokee. The only problem is, once I am DNA branded for life by an official DNA test, I may have to add Chinese, Ubangi, Hottentot, Coast Guard, Railroad gambling man, pest, Bolshevik, and Pitcairn mutineer.

Just imagine how it would help Donald Trump's temperament if he found he is 20% North Korean. And imagine how it would help keep the peace if Farrakhan learned he is 35% Calvinist. 

The only exception as to listing DNA on driver's licenses would be if someone's DNA came up with 20% Holstein or Pit Bull. No one should be forced to have to explain that.

This plan would have some wonderful effects on the culture. Politicians would be able to present themselves to their own ethnic and racial heritage people to get votes. Companies could hire people with multiple ethnic percentages in order to be racially and politically correct. Racist programs of the US Government could be sure to claim diversity in hiring and in distributing welfare benefits. And, White people who have been traditionally forbidden to live in inner city ghettos would have the right to observe their 3% of African American heritage and move to the ghetto.

Contact your Congressman, and tell him you want a law like this. We can do away with racism finally by instituting this modest proposal.